Why I Trust God

Five years ago, I was happily married with three wonderful children, a loving husband and all the material comfort I had ever wanted. Yet I knew my life wasn't on the right track. I had always been self reliant and confident that I could handle anything, but I was angry, frustrated, and so tired! I desperately wanted someone to take care of me for a change.

I watched the ordered lives of some of the other mums at Christchurch school and realised they had something. I went to church occasionally and one Sunday I heard a sermon that went straight to my heart. The vicar (David Vail) said something like, "if you cannot totally disregard the existence of our creator then you owe it to yourself to learn more about Him. Staying on the fence will get you nowhere!"

Eventually I signed up for an Alpha Course. It was fascinating and surprisingly relevant to every day issues. I learned about all the historical evidence and the history of the Bible and why we should read it. When we learned the meaning of each phrase of the Lord's prayer, I realised that God is taking care of me, He is the ultimate Father, He understands me.

I was nervous and so excited about making a commitment to Him but I knew I had received a brilliant gift and I needed to say thank you and open it. So I prayed a prayer silently along with the speaker asking Jesus to be Lord of my life and turned away from all the things I knew to be wrong.

I came from each Alpha evening full of enthusiasm and hope. Gone was my uncertainty and frustration. I no longer had to worry about what my life is for. God made me for a reason and He is not going to let me waste it.

I stopped worrying that a wonderful opportunity might pass me by. God has given me a great passion for something and He won't let me fail to discover what it is. He is going to help me fulfil my potential and use me to help others along the way.

God has given me a new outlook on the challenges of every day. I now go into a difficult situation excited about how God might use me to make a difference. I am comforted by James 1:12, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him" and this verse which I use every day from Philippians 4:6-7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the Peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

It is lovely to know that God is always with me. God is my friend. He will use me just as I am. He has given me the gift of Peace. I pray that you experience him in the same way - if not already, then sometime soon.